How can I get close to you? I’m too shy to talk to you; so at this moment it feels safer to watch you from afar with no rejections. You have taken up residence in my mind. I want so badly for you to tell me everything I want to hear but you won’t. I want you to tell me that you want me, but you won’t. Every time I think of you I can feel the butterflies fluttering inside of me. You don’t notice me or the way I look at you; maybe it’s ‘cause you only see me as a friend and nothing more, but when I look at you, nothing could turn my eyes away.
when you listen to me when we talk, it disarms me. you are the only one i know who gives me full attention like that. what you don’t realize is that the more i talk to you, the more i swoon. i never want our conversations to end.
i need that if one day the fancy should strike me to jump in my car, drive over to your place, and upon knocking on your door, see your surprised face, kiss you, and then with a smile, leave you standing there with a wave for goodbye, saying over my shoulder: “it’s because i felt like kissing you just now” - i need for you to be OK with that. with me. with this kind of girl, who loves spontaneity and sweet things and is hoping that you will like them too.
Do the world a favor and open your bloody eyes! Look up! I’m here *jumps up and down and waves arms* where I’ve been for a year, and always will be unless you tell me otherwise. I know you’re “damaged” but so am I and for the same basic reasons. I’m well aware that I will never completely understand what happened to you over there (the only way I can is to do the same thing and sorry but the army won’t let me, I asked.) but I’ve been on the other side and I’m willing to spend the rest of my life trying to understand yours. If I can’t understand then I’ll sit next you and hand you booze and watch cheesy zombie movies until you can deal again.
I’m going to keep denying that I constantly think about you. No one would ever expect it, and neither would you. Or maybe you would, I don’t know. I’m sorry that you’re on my mind a lot. I feel sort of bad about it.
Remember that day when we sat together in the park? You asked me what I was thinking, but I didn’t tell the truth. The truth is I was thinking about YOU and how much I adore you. Now I realize honesty is the best policy.